You might have had more than a few experiences where your senior seems to just be angry at you, no matter what you do. This isn’t unusual and it can be incredibly frustrating as a caregiver.
Stop and Take Some Inventory
As much as it might hurt, take a few minutes and look at the situation objectively. Does your senior have some points when she complains? There might be a grain of truth in there somewhere, even if she’s sharing that point in a way that’s hurtful to you. But if you’re doing everything that you can do, and to the best of your ability, you might have to take a deep breath and let her rant while letting her words roll off your back. That’s not always easy, but it’s something you need to do.
Make Sure She Has Choices
When people get older and their lives become limited in some ways, that creates an emotional response. For instance, if your senior isn’t able to drive anymore, that can make her furious. She’s furious at life and at the circumstances, but you’re a handy target. What you can do in that situation is to make sure that she’s still got at least some choices. Choice gives her an element of control, which is part of what she’s missing.
Let Her Vent
Once you’ve determined you’re literally doing everything you can do, she may just have to vent to you. Let her know that you’re doing all that you can, but that she can still set aside some time just to vent. Make it a weekly or even a daily event if you’d like. Sit and listen to her vent and don’t argue back. Afterward, she might find that her complaints are spent now that you’re letting her air them as much as she can.
Take Time Away
You also need to make sure you’re taking care of yourself during all of this. Hire senior care providers and take some time away. Your sanity is going to depend on you doing this as often as you can. It’s one thing to support your senior as much as possible, but if she’s not letting up on you at all, you have to be the one to take a break. It will help more than you realize.
You can’t make your senior feel happier, but you can let her know you’re doing everything possible. Remember not to take her moods personally, because that’s just going to cause you pain and suffering.